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Needless to say, I am in no way offended by what he Icloud hacked celebrity nudes — in fact, I applaud his actions, hence the title of this essay — and I know deep down Clinton would love to explode in a self-righteous rage of gloating and frat-boy braggadocio. While biting his lip, getting misty eyed, and politely talking about counseling with professional and priest alike, I can see the intellectual within; resenting every waking second of his forced march through a nation that seems to tolerate everything except the failure to grovel and beg for mercy.

Watching the former President hit the talk show circuit in support of his autobiography is truly sick, and we as a nation are to blame. My God, he came in the Oval Office! Let it be said: I not only applaud his decision to use some dimwitted heifer for a quickie, but I advocate, without a trace of sarcasm, supplying each and every President with a stable of chicks; all at our expense. Being the most heavily guarded man on planet earth, he must rely on what comes to him, which is usually Monica lewinsky naked fucked with penis more than a pathetic intern or frumpy secretary.

Clinton needs some Monica lewinsky naked fucked with penis, young, orally-fixated chicks; the sort of women who will keep his mind sharp and perspective fresh. History is clear on this matter. Nixon never got laid and he was a raging asshole who shit on the Constitution. I mean, Monica lewinsky naked fucked with penis at Babs].

Clinton made some mistakes, sure, but all can be traced to his frustrating search for prime pussy. When it failed to show up, he signed the Welfare Reform bill. There are only three times during the Clinton years when I knew he was pounding ass, or at least letting a healthy rack smack him in the face — the appointments of Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Stephen Breyer to the Supreme Court, and standing firm on the attempted government shutdown by Newt Gingrich.

Check the White House log; I guarantee within hours of those decisions, Bill was conveniently Monica lewinsky naked fucked with penis for. As an honest liberal, I will admit that Clinton was far from the perfect President. He often failed, and he gave in too quickly to the forces that tried to bring him down — except for impeachment. By pulling out his own Jumbo with a debt of gratitude to the first President to use his cock to make a point, the late Lyndon Baines JohnsonClinton saved the Constitution, beat back the forces of reaction and crypto-fascism, and made us all proud again to be Americans.

But he never, ever should have apologized for anything. Well, at least in my house. LBJ, Kennedy, Eisenhower, and FDR all Monica lewinsky naked fucked with penis around like horny teenagers, and few would ever consider consigning such men to the ash heap of history.

Is he any less of a giant? All I ask is that we grant Clinton the same respect. That makes him as moral as they come. And please, no psychoanalysis. Sex is good; sex is right. And outside of forcible rape, everything is on the table. But even that has its exceptions. He has a country to run. He divides his time between classics of cinema and the most ridiculous movies he can find on Redbox.

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